Eyes Upon Him (A Testimony of Michael J. C. Liu)

I was one of the pianists of NRETC (National Reformed Evangelical Teen Convention), Jakarta 2012. I was glad to be given the opportunity to attend to such a wonderful convention. It was that week when I first heard Ev. Michael JC Liu's testimony. Torn, I was reminded of multitudes of sins that I have done and how unworthy I am. Since that day, I returned back to God once again. At the end of Michael's testimony, he advised us to read Psalm 40 whenever I feel like falling and walking off the right path.

"When you have time, read Psalm 40", he said. "If you don't have time, then make time".
I give praise to the LORD for calling me back to the right path over and over again through His servants.Without further ado, below is Michael's testimony:

Good evening.
Whenever I am giving my testimony on stage, I think of myself as someone unworthy. If you are a Christian, you need to understand that it is a privilege for an individual to share a testimony for God. Who are we? We are totally depraved; it is by God’s grace and grace alone that we are saved. What makes us to be worthy to serve Lord God Almighty?

What makes us to be worthy to offer something to the Lord God? The whole earth is His, and everything is created by Him. It is Him who is worthy of all the praises. His name alone should be glorified.

When I was 14, my mother sent me to New York City. At that time, she joined a Christian church. Many new immigrants got their spiritual and practical needs met there, including my mother. She felt warmly welcomed in the church. When I was 15 years old, she was baptized, after which, she commanded me to attend her church. Before this, she was always very gentle; she had never used her authority as a mother. I thought I must listen to her first commandment, ever. As a result, I went to the church.

The Problem of Humility

Some people take pride in accomplishments and special abilities, and some in disability and absurd humility. It is clear to say that a man is arrogant when he claims that he is the smartest, the most beautiful or that he is god. But an extreme humility would also mean arrogance. But how could we label a person arrogant when he claims that he is unable to accomplish great things or that his talents do not surpass others' expectancy?

Paul, in 1 Corinthians 1:21-31 clearly states that God is our source of power and wisdom. No matter who we are, ministers or pastors, we preach to others in foolishness compared to His wisdom. However, despite our incompetence before    God, He is pleased that we, who believe, could be saved through the foolishness of what was preached. Even the most intelligent and wise man in existence is nothing compared to His wisdom. In the Ancient Greek Classification, power and wisdom are two separate ideas. But in gospel, power and wisdom are one.

"For since in the wisdom of God the world through its wisdom did not know him, God was pleased through the foolishness of what was preached to save those who believe. 

Jews demand signs and Greeks look for wisdom, but we preach Christ crucified: a stumbling block to Jews and foolishness to Gentiles, but to those whom God has called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God. 

For the foolishness of God is wiser than human wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than human strength.

Brothers and sisters, think of what you were when you were called. 

Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. 

But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. 

God chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before him. 

It is because of Him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God—that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption. 

Therefore, as it is written: “Let the one who boasts boast in the LORD.” 

~1 Corinthians 1:21-31 (NIV)

THE SOURCE OF POWER & WISDOM

This is a reminder that in order to be humble, we ought to believe that God is the only source of power and wisdom, from whom our abilities and talents overflow from.
This is also a reminder to be humble—on the other extreme. To not undermine the grace and gifts that He has given to us.
When we claim that we are not eloquent enough to spread the gospel of God, to stand up for His name, or even to multiply the talents that He has given to us, we too are claiming that His gifts are vain. You are boasting about your life, because you keep on looking at your drawbacks and faults.

Murdering Dreams for Love

Can't you see by now that your sacrifice has brought you to the most extraordinary places? And who knows what would come tomorrow or the day after. You hear it all the time, the voice coming from nowhere. You often cover up your ears so that the melodies stop ringing. But they are the very melodies that would possibly bring you to other places. Have you not realized that yet?
You've been walking not on your dreams, but on the dreams of others.

But you would be lying if you stop there, don't you think? Your greatest dream is to bring joy to the people you love. Love does not give a single care about whether or not you have been hurt in the past, love is courageous, love endures long, and above all, love sacrifices.
And beyond your sacrifice, you have seen signs of your other smaller dreams. They slowly build up higher and higher until they become too obvious to be abandoned. This is something we call grace, a mere privilege, something you should never experience a taste of it. You ought to keep on reminding yourself that the true meaning of sacrifice is to bear the pain for bringing joy to your loved ones.

Further up, this dream continues to rise, until you could no longer see what's ahead of you. You thought it was there to tempt you, to barricade you from reaching your ultimate dream. But I'm afraid you thought wrong. It was there to stay. It was meant to be.
Ever since you laid down your dreams for love, you have been receiving the gifts of love, hope and grace. And with these, came along your tiny dream puzzle pieces. And without you knowing it, you have already achieved your dreams and even more. This means also, something you would never thought of dreaming of.

In "murdering" yourself for others, you would at last find out who you really are:

A beautiful being of love and devotion.

"Whoever finds their life will lose it, 

And whoever loses their life for my sake will find it." 

- Matthew 10:39

Keep On living,

Alice

The Thing I Was Made For

You may have noticed that the books you really love are bound together by a secret thread.
You know very well what is the common quality that makes you love them, though you cannot put it into words. But most of your friends do not see it at all, and often wonder why, liking this, you should also like that.


Again, you have stood before some landscape, which seems to embody what you have been looking for all your life; and then turned to the friend at your side who appears to be seeing what you saw—but at the first words a gulf yawns between you, and you realise that this landscape means something totally different to him, that he is pursuing an alien vision and cares nothing for the ineffable suggestion by which you are transported.

Even in your hobbies, has there not always been some secret attraction which the others are curiously ignorant of -- something, not to be identified with, but always on the verge of breaking through, the smell of cut wood in the workshop or the clap-clap of water against the boat's side?
Are not all lifelong friendships born at the moment when at last you meet another human being who has some inkling (but faint and uncertain even in the best) of that something which you were born desiring, and which, beneath the flux of other desires and in all the momentary silences between the louder passions, night and day, year by year, from childhood to old age, you are looking for, watching for, listening for? You have never had it. All the things that have ever deeply possessed your soul have been but hints of it—tantalising glimpses, promises never quite fulfilled, echoes that died away just as they caught your ear.

But if it should really become manifest—if there ever came an echo that did not die away but swelled into the sound itself—you would know it. Beyond all possibility of doubt you would say "Here at last is the thing I was made for". We cannot tell each other about it. It is the secret signature of each soul, the incommunicable and unappeasable want, the thing we desired before we met our wives or made our friends or chose our work, and which we shall still desire on our deathbeds, when the mind no longer knows wife or friend or work.
While we are, this is. If we lose this, we lose all.

― C.S. Lewis, The Problem of Pain

I'm currently reading this book called The Problem of Pain. I strictly restrict myself to comment anything on this quote, for its beauty is enough and truth cannot be any truer.

"Here at last is the thing I was made for".

Alice

Slave to Beauty

I'm getting right at my point. Girls try way too hard to be beautiful.

Well, I'd be lying if I deny the fact that I never try to be beautiful. Beauty improves our social life and it somehow becomes a part of our pride. It is in fact, something that has been planted since the day we were born. Your pictures are posted everywhere, passed around, not passing without every person's judgement on you. I remember what my older sister told me on my first day of high school, "No matter whether you like it or not, sooner or later, there will be at least a friend of yours who judge you for who you are and what you do. And that's not the worst case. That judgement will spread all over the place, including to the people that you value and love, then will it eventually come back to you and hurt you. Just a brief warning. Don't screw up your first day of high school."

And yes! Those things above are the things we should be aware of, but there are limits on everything we do. We may please others, but we have to constantly remind ourselves of our limits. And sometimes, the most difficult part is not to stand firm despite the stream, but to know these limits—to remember who you are, your thoughts, your beauty, your personalities, your perks and your true self, in the midst of this society that will never be gratified.

What Christians Believe

The Rival Conceptions of God

Let's now talk about what Christians do not have to believe in. If you are a Christian, you do not have to think that other religions are wholly wrong. You are free to think that in all religions in the world, there are hints of truths. While in an atheist's point of view, you do have to think that the whole idea of religion is a huge mistake all through. When you are working on a mathematical problem, there is only one right answer to the problem. However, some wrong answers are nearer to the correct answer to the others.

Humanity is divided into two big categories: the majority who believe in God or gods and the minority who do not. Christianity, Hindus, Greeks belong with the majority. The next big division is Pantheism and Christianity. Pantheism believe that God is beyond good and evil. They believe that is is wise to see whether or not a thing is bad or good in a point of view. For example, cancer is bad, but the doctor who kills cancer would also be bad. It depends on the point of view. Similarly, they would say that God is a God who loves love and hates hate.

Pantheism also believe that God created you according to how He created the universe. And that the universe itself is almost God. If the universe does not exist, so would He. The Christian idea is different. God created the universe just like we painted a picture or composed a piece of music. We are not the painting nor piece of music and we do not die if our creations are destroyed. Our idea of beauty reflects in our painting, and so does God's in His creation. This does not mean that He is the creation itself. We also cannot say some things are bad when we claim that God is good, because these things are a part of God. We must then think that God is separated from the whole creation that we see and that they go against His will. He created things like men made up stories. The stories are great, but they have gone wrong. And God insists men to bring things back to the right track.

And here goes the big questions, "If God is good, then why would He created a world that can go wrong?", "Isn't it much simpler to think that this world was not made by an intelligent power? Why avoid the obvious?" But this thinking lead us to another difficult thought.

Clue to the Meaning of the Universe

The Law of Human Nature

When people quarrel, a person is trying to show that the other person is wrong. In order for this to happen, both of them have to agree on what is Right and Wrong. Just like in a soccer game, we cannot say a player commits a foul if the rule is not agreed by everyone.

This human morality of Right and Wrong is called the Law of Nature. to be more exact, The Law of Human Nature. In modern days, people refer the Law of Nature as the law of gravity, chemistry or heredity. We live by this kind of Law of Nature, our physical body has no freedom of choosing to obey or disobey the rule of gravity. We throw a rock, it falls. We jump up high, we fall back to the ground. We obey the Law of Nature no matter how much we are trying to go against them.

This is very similar to the Law of Human Nature. These laws are also called the Moral Law that all humans agree to. For example, you must not put yourself first before others. True that different cultures might have different morals. One culture says it's Right for a man to marry just one woman, and the other culture says it's Right for a man to marry as many women as he desires. But both cultures have a common morality of men having to marry the woman he likes. the Law of Human Nature is the soccer game's rule that all humans agree to, consciously or unconsciously.

In other words, we are rather "pressed on" by the Law of Human Nature. However, we never truly follow these rule of descent behavior. Even if we do not believe in it, our conscience brings guilt to us when we do not behave decently. Because we cannot help facing the fact of breaking it.

We are left off by two points. Firstly, all humans on this earth have an idea that they should behave in a certain way, and that we have no power against it. Secondly, we always fail to behave in that certain way. We have the ability to know it, but not the ability to practice it. This is a big clue and foundation to the meaning of us and the universe we live in.